


Wee Three Penguins

by lamentables



Category: due South
Genre: M/M, Other, Penguins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-11-30
Updated: 2007-11-30
Packaged: 2017-10-21 03:14:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/220297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lamentables/pseuds/lamentables
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Their mission has taken them from one pole to the other, always reaching out a flipper to other animals, making peace with their natural enemies, and seeking donuts wherever they go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wee Three Penguins

**Author's Note:**

  * For [catwalksalone](https://archiveofourown.org/users/catwalksalone/gifts).



**Prologue**

a conversation with catwalksalone

CAT: point of order about my journal layout - how are the penguins looking at the Northern Lights? Are they on holiday?

ME: not so much a holiday as a pilgrimage. Stories of The Wolf and The Turtle reached their colony a few years ago and all the penguins have been profoundly moved by these tales of two animals who, despite being natural enemies, live together in harmony in The North. In fact, the penguins found the stories so inspiring that some of them formed The Church of the Reaching Out Flipper.

The young penguins in your journal are the first from their church to undertake a pilgrimage. Their mission has taken them from one pole to the other always reaching out a flipper to other animals, making peace with their natural enemies, and seeking donuts wherever they go.

CAT: That has to be one of the cutest things ever. ^_^

ME: Their names, by the way, are Ernest, Roald and Fabian.

CAT: Oh!

And that is so ridiculously cute it makes me want to cry.

Are they an OT3 of penguins?

ME: Not yet, no. See the way Fabian is standing with his flippers behind his back, as though he's on duty outside the Penguin Consulate? That's because he's noticed how Ernest and Roald have been reaching their flippers out towards each other when they think he isn't looking. Fabian wouldn't mind doing a bit of reaching out himself, but Ernest and Roald seem only to have eyes for each other.

Poor Fabian.

CAT: Oh noes! Fabian is all alone. *cries*

But Ernest and Roald just think he wouldn't be interested, so they're trying to respect his wishes, right? Right?

ME: That's right. You know how the baby!penguins grow up in a big giant huddle, and there's supposed to be rotation so that every baby!penguin gets a turn at being in the middle of all that love and warmth and each baby!penguin gets to experience the cold and loneliness at the edge of the huddle?

Well when our baby!pilgrims were hatched, something went wrong with the system and Fabian spent all his time on the very outermost edge of the huddle. As a result he's the only penguin ever to have hangups about touching and to get flustered when other penguins invade his personal space.

That's partly why he joined the church, to do something about his shyness, and to help him learn how to reach out a flipper to others. It's not that he doesn't care, he's a very loving and sympathetic penguin, but he's not comfortable with physical intimacy. I fear that Ernest and Roald have mistaken his unease for lack of interest and maybe even for disgust.

CAT: Oh, poor Fabian *resists cuddling him in order not to make him uncomfortable*

I do hope the penguins manage to talk about this issue. I don't think Fabian would bring it up, though, perhaps out of a misplaced sense of honour. Maybe something magical will happen under the Northern Lights.

ME: All his hope is pinned on The Wolf and The Turtle. Fabian hasn't told anyone this, but his motivation in volunteering for the pilgrimage was the stories he discovered about how The Great Ones have sometimes been instrumental in helping the shy and lonely to overcome their fears and find love.

If he's interpreted the texts correctly, and he's pretty sure he has, an animal of honour who truly wants to form a deep and lasting bond (as well as to enjoy physical intimacies) with another need only present The Wolf with a doughnut and The Turtle with a lettuce leaf and the burden of his repression will be lifted.

CAT: Yay!

He will find The Wolf and The Turtle, won't he?

*worries*

ME: I think so, but my powers to see in the future are weak right now. I have to go and eat a scone and drink some chai latte in order to restore them.

\---

 **Wee Three Penguins**

"Um, Frase?"

Fraser looked towards the door and raised a quizzical eyebrow, but carried on stirring the spaghetti sauce he was adapting from Ma Vecchio's secret recipe.

"There are no penguins in the Artic, right?"

"That's correct, Ray. All penguin species are native to the southern hemisphere though they are not, contrary to popular belief, found only in cold climates. In fact only a few species of penguins live as far south as Antarctica and about ten species live in the temperate zone; one lives as far north as the Galapagos Islands"

"You're sure about that?"

"I'm certain Ray."

"And if, say, a bunch of penguins were to find themselves in the Artic? Maybe they're on holiday, or they've come to see the Northern Lights or something. Would it be dangerous?"

"For us or for the penguins, Ray?"

"For the penguins, you freak. I hardly think three tiny penguins are a major threat to humans." Ray paused with his parka shrugged off one shoulder. "Unless they're ninja penguins." Fraser lifted the pan off the heat and switched his attention to Ray as Ray hung up the parka and then tugged off his sweater. Running his fingers through his hair in an entirely unsuccessful attempt to get it stand up in the approved manner, Ray observed thoughtfully "They didn't look like ninja penguins."

Fraser sat down at the scrubbed wooden table in the kitchen and made a few annotations to the recipe, noting that his home-minced caribou required the addition of a little extra fat if the meatballs were to retain their integrity in the same way as Ma Vecchio's ground beef meatballs. "You know Ray, there were giant prehistoric penguins; some of them attained the size and weight of an adult human. If there were a group of prehistoric penguins lurking outside our cabin we might be in danger." He closed the notebook decisively. It was neatly covered with brown wrapping paper had the word 'RECIPES' carefully hand-lettered across the front and on the spine. Another, less tidy hand had added the words 'Ben and Ray's', adorning the B with a stetson and the R with carefully spiked hair.

"No, these are just little guys."

"Adult penguins have few natural predators on land, though they are often killed in the water. I'm not aware of many seals, sea lions or killer whales in the vicinity, however, so I don't think the risk is high. I'm not sure about the relationship between penguins and wolves, but unless they are a hitherto unknown species of sweet penguin that has evolved icing and sprinkles, then I think they are probably safe from Dief."

Ray rolled his eyes. "Benton, I'm serious here. There are three penguins hanging about near the woodpile."

"You are aware that the Galapagos Islands are significantly south of our present location?"

"There. Are. Penguins. Outside."

"Of course there are, Ray."

Fraser picked up the recipe book to return it to its place on the shelves, but stopped suddenly and cocked his head to one side, looking disturbingly like Diefenbaker. "Did you hear that?"

"Huh?" Ray shook his head.

Fraser lifted a finger to his lips and both men listened, motionless. This time they both heard a faint scraping noise at the door of the cabin. Ray signalled Fraser to stay put and padded almost silently over to the door. He paused and the sound came again. He glanced over at Fraser, who nodded, and then flung open the door with a flourish. No-one there. Ray scanned right and left, and then looked down when he felt a gentle tapping on his shin. Penguins!

"See, penguins." He pointed down at the two little figures in the doorway. "Wait a minute, there were three of them before." He peered around again. "Hey guys, where'd your friend go?"

"Really Ray, this is remarkable." Fraser had gently placed the recipe book back on the table and moved slowly across to join Ray in the doorway. "Fascinating." He squatted down to inspect the two penguins more closely. Penguin number two, the penguin who had not been tapping Ray on the shin, tentatively extended a flipper towards Fraser, who calmly reached out a finger in return, touched the flipper and said softly "Pleased to meet you. I am Sergeant Benton Fraser of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. Welcome to Canada." Penguin number two relaxed visibly and poked penguin number one, gesturing in Fraser's direction. Penguin one also extended a flipper, but with far more certainty. Again Fraser touched the flipper in greeting and welcomed its owner to Canada.

Whilst Fraser was doing the polite thing Ray had moved out onto the decking, muttering about getting his socks damp, and was looking around for the missing third penguin. There was a soft thump from the foot of the steps. Ray looked down. Another thump. Ray carried on watching. Penguin one waddled over to the top of the steps and stood next to Ray looking down at penguin number three, who was attempting to haul a travois up the steps. As if sleds and steps weren't a difficult enough combination for a penguin anyway, this one was piled to about half the penguin's own height with haphazardly wrapped packages. The first penguin called out to the struggling penguin below, who waved his flipper in what was unmistakably a gesture indicating he would accept no help and could manage fine on his own, thank you kindly. Ray smiled, "Hey, this one down here is called Benton, for sure!"

"Actually, Ray, his name is Fabian" came Fraser's voice from behind him. Ray looked round in surprise to find Fraser lying on his stomach on the rag rug in just inside the doorway apparently deep in conversation with penguin number two. "This one is Ernest, and your friend over there is Roald."

"Your grandparents had books on how to speak penguin?"

"No, I'm afraid their library was lacking in that respect, but it would seem that so many years of conversing with Diefenbaker has allowed me to develop an unusual facility with animal languages. Apparently these penguins are on a quest." Fraser stopped translating and made interrogative noises at Ernest. "A quest, or perhaps a pilgrimage."

Ray had turned back to the steps and continued to watch Fabian's fruitless struggles. "OK little guy, that's it. I don't care how competent and independent you think you are, I'm going to help you. Chill, fella, this is me coming slowly down the steps and helping you with the sled. Stay calm, Fabulous, or whatever your name was." Ray moved off the steps, suppressing the urge to dance from one foot to the other in an attempt to keep off the snowy ground as much as possible. He lifted the travois which was strapped to Fabian by a tiny harness that went around his flippers and buckled at his midriff. "OK, you start with the climbing and I'll take the weight back here."

Fabian swallowed hard, but bravely recommenced his scramble up the steps and arrived at the doorway just a few minutes later with Ray bent almost double behind him. Roald greeted the other penguin with congratulatory noises, but Ray noticed how, despite his outflung flippers, Roald pulled up short and didn't follow through with what he'd been sure would be a penguin hug. Ray gently dropped the sled back to the ground and allowed Fabian to drag it inside all by himself. Then he shooed Roald indoors. "Come on guys, we're trying to heat the cabin here, not the entire Yukon."

Ernest continued to chat with Fraser, who was still lying on his stomach with his chin propped in his hands. Fabian stood next to his luggage in a posture which looked to Ray remarkably like parade rest. Roald, however, was waddling around the cabin looking every inch (though really there weren't many inches) the fearless explorer. Keeping one eye on Roald, Ray sat cross-legged on the floor next to Fabian. "Hey Fab, relax will you. No point in doing statue duty here. No penguin consulates in the Yukon. That's right isn't it, Ben?"

"Ray?"

"No penguin consulates in the territories? Fabbie here should just chill."

"That is correct, Ray. Perhaps you should assist Fabian in removing his harness." Fraser spoke quickly to Fabian who nodded slightly, and cautiously turned towards Ray. Ray had just finished unbuckling the penguin's harness when there was a crash and a penguin-sized "oof" from the kitchen area. He stood up just in time to see an over-turned water bowl and Roald flat on his back next to it before Diefenbaker came bounding through from the bedroom to investigate.

Everyone froze for a moment. Ray looked at Fabian who looked back with wide eyes (who knew a penguin could do big Mountie eyes) and Ernest waddled a little closer to Fraser. Fraser murmured "Oh dear" and Diefenbaker just stood over the penguin, sniffing. Roald was the only person - the only non-wolf type person - in the room who was unconcerned by the situation. Slowly he reached up with a flipper and touched the tip of Dief's nose. Dief looked to Ray with an expression even Ray could read, and then righted his dish.

"It's a penguin, Dief, and there are two more over here." Dief raised an eyebrow. "On land penguins have no natural enemies, furface, and that includes wolves. And half-wolves. You even dream about chasing one of these guys and you're sleeping in the barn. Geddit?" Dief rolled his eyes and looked back at Roald who had managed to stand up again. He took a final sniff at the penguin who stepped backwards, wobbled and fell down again, flailing his flippers wildly. Dief grinned in a satisfied manner and moved off towards Fraser and the other penguins.

Suddenly Fabian dashed towards Fraser, looking like he was participating in the penguin olympics. He came to rest close to Fraser's left ear and began chirruping softly at him, rocking backwards and forwards with excitement. "Ah" said Fraser, and rubbed his eyebrow.

"Wolves are the penguin's natural enemy after all, huh?"

"On the contrary. It appears that our intrepid band of penguins has actually come here in search of a certain half-wolf. And someone else. Something else...a mince pie? No. Muscle? Oh, mussel! Shell...Ah. Yes. Yes. I see." Fraser switched to penguin and chirruped his response. Ray drummed his fingers on the back of the kitchen chair. Ernest interjected. Fraser listened and looked up at Ray when the two penguins fell silent. "Oh dear."

"Come on, spill, I don't do the Dr Doolittle thing remember."

"Well, Ray, the object of the pilgrimage is not just to meet Dief but to witness The Wolf and The Turtle living in harmony. Our friends here have travelled from the other side of the world on what is effectively a peace mission. And they have gifts for both the wolf and the turtle."

"Don't they know that Kelsey needs to hibernate?"

"Apparently not. Their knowledge of animal life outside their own Antarctic colony has all been gathered empirically en route. Except for certain stories of The Wolf and The Turtle, which have been transmitted orally from generation to generation of penguin, and about which Fabian here is an acknowledged expert. Hibernation has not featured in the stories."

"Well they can give still give Dief his present. And really, the turtle isn't that interesting."

"No, it is the interaction between Wolf and Turtle which is important to our pilgrims."

Ray sniggered. Fraser looked slightly offended. "Pilgrims. I can just see them in their little pilgrim hats, eating turkey and cranberry sauce. Or would turkey be cannibalism? And don't give me the Mountie sigh, Benton. I am taking it seriously. But there's nothing we can do. It's going to be another three weeks at least before it's warm enough to wake up Kelsey."

\---

Ray swung the axe down into the next log and left it sticking there while he mopped at his sweaty forehead with his sleeve. It was good to be outdoors and working, free to move around without fear of stepping on a penguin. One small cabin was just about big enough for two grown men and half-wolf, but add three small penguins to the mix and suddenly the place was more crowded than a Chicago bar at happy hour. Talking of penguins, Fraser was heading his way, complete with shadow. And really, he wasn't sure whether Fabian was turning into a small black and white Mountie, or if maybe Benton had some penguin heritage he'd previously failed to mention, because it was getting kind of hard to tell them apart. "Hey, it's the dynamic duo."

"Ray, I thought perhaps you'd like a drink."

"Thanks." Ray took the mug of tea with a grin. "I've been working up quite a sweat."

"So I've noticed" Fraser observed, moving closer and reaching out to touch Ray's hair. "The spikes are looking a little less, ah, exuberant."

"Yeah, well, there was too much exuberant happening. I needed to work off some energy."

Fraser's hand moved from Ray's hair to his cheek. "Don't use up all your energy, will you. I was hoping we could be exuberant together later." He ran his thumb across Ray's lower lip and his tongue across his own.

Ray reached out with his free hand and pulled Fraser to him, grinning. "You want to get exuberant with me, eh?" He wriggled his hips suggestively, letting Fraser feel his arousal. "Just let me put down this tea and I'll tell exactly what I think about that." He pulled away from Fraser and began to move towards the log his axe was anchored in. Then he paused. And straightened up. "Erm, Frase. Your penguin's watching us."

"Fabian is a very curious individual, Ray. He wants to learn about everything."

"Yeah, well, if he doesn't already know about making out, I'm not giving demonstrations. And my exuberant kinda disappears when I'm being watched." He kissed Fraser gently on the cheek. "What's for dinner? I'm nearly done here."

 

Ray sighed contentedly as he pushed back his chair and started to get up from the kitchen table. "Oh boy, that was good. Better than Ma Vecchio's I'd say."

"I wouldn't say it where she can hear you, Ray. And you don't have to clear up, I can do it later."

"Fair's fair. You cooked, I clean."

"Yes, but you chopped all that wood. Let me help at least?"

"It's a deal. The sooner it's done, the better. And I wouldn't mind you doing a bit of massage on this shoulder. I might have overdone it out there with the axe."

They set to clearing the table and washing the dishes, working smoothly around each other. Fraser drying and putting everything away as he regaled Ray with the day's happening in town.

"Really? With just a mukluk and a caribou antler? Wish I'd seen that!" Ray laughed as he folded wrung out the dishcloth and neatly refolded it. Fraser dropped a kiss on the back his neck. "I doubt he'll do it that way again. Right. Time to sort out that shoulder of yours."

 

Ray sat on the floor in front of the fire between Fraser's outstretched legs. The firelight gave his naked torso a golden glow which Fraser was trying to ignore as he worked one of his homemade salves into Ray's sore muscles. Just outside the glow of the firelight, apparently hoping not to be noticed, three penguins watched with wrapt attention. Fabian stood slightly closer to the men so he was unable to see that Ernest was gently, almost absent-mindedly, caressing Roald as they watched. Fabian was, however, able to hear the slide of flipper against smooth penguin feathers as well as the slide of human hand against human skin and he was finding it all increasingly difficult to ignore. Then Ray let his head drop back against Fraser's chest and all sounds but the fire ceased.

"Mmmmm. Thanks. That's better."

Fraser let his hands slide down Ray's sides coming to rest on his belly in a gesture that looked both protective and possessive. "Want me to read some more of _Kingfisher Days_?"

Ray didn't reply immediately, just resting there with his eyes closed and a blissed-out expression on his face. "Yeah" he eventually sighed "but I don't want you to move and I don't want the lights on."

Fraser softly kissed his hairline and tip of his ear. "We could just go to bed?"

"Yeah. But again with the not moving, right?" Fraser huffed a soft laugh and after a few more minutes gently eased to his feet and hauled Ray up from the floor. "C'mon. Bedtime for you, Sleeping Beauty."

Only one penguin followed as Fraser tugged Ray by the hand towards the bedroom, and because Ray had his eyes closed and Fraser was concentrating on the way Ray's muscles moved under his skin, they were naked and in bed, snuggled together with Ray's head once more on Fraser's chest before either of them noticed the penguin in the doorway. Ray rolled his eyes and pointed at the offending bird. "Out!"

Fraser repeated the instruction in penguin, never mind that Ray's intention should have been clear to speakers of all languages, and then climbed out of bed to shoo the penguin away.

"That Fabian...little pervert" Ray muttered, but honestly his heart wasn't in it, because the way Fraser's ass flexed as he leaned round to doorframe to watch the departing Fabian was distracting as hell. As Fraser slid back under the quilt Ray rolled onto his back stretched seductively and asked "Didn't someone promise me exuberance?"

 

Back in the lounge, Fabian stood quietly watching again. This time it was Ernest and Roald who were snuggled cosily against the cushions of the couch, murmuring softly to each other and doing lots of touching. Fabian turned his back and went to sleep by the fire, as close as he dared to The Wolf.

\---

Fraser had not even had time to hang up his hat before Ray blustered into the cabin after him, banging the door. "Benton. Bedroom. Now." Fraser tugged at his ear and raised an enquiring eyebrow.

Ray just jerked his head towards the bedroom, and there was something in that single-mindedness that had Fraser instantly breathing hard and yes, getting hard too.

He closed the bedroom door behind them and had Ray pinned to it before Ray had chance to speak. Not that Ray was showing any sign of wanting to speak, with Fraser's hand twisted in his hair and Fraser's tongue his mouth. It was only when Fraser stopped kissing him and began biting down his neck towards his collar bone that Ray gasped "Ben! This is. This. It's not what I meant."

"You want me to stop, Ray" Fraser growled?

"Yes. No. It's good. But we need to talk." Fraser stopped licking his ear. "It's the penguins. We need to talk where the penguins can't hear." Fraser sighed and moved away.

"Is there any lettuce available in town yet?"

"You stopped me so you could talk about lettuce? Besides penguins don't eat lettuce."

"No, but turtles eat lettuce."

"Kelsey won't be hungry when he first wakes and we have plenty of suitable food him already."

"We need lettuce. You remember the packages Fabian was pulling on his little sled, the ones we stored in the cupboard behind the maple syrup so that Dief didn't get them? Well, I looked inside them today."

"Ray, I don't think it's very polite to go rummaging through a guest's possessions."

"One: I wasn't rummaging; I had a hunch. And two, it's just as well I did rummage. Those dumb penguins have brought gifts for The Wolf and The Turtle, remember? Well in our kitchen cupboard there's a very, very stale donut that either has green sprinkles or has started to grow mould, and there's what was probably once a lettuce leaf but is now a puddle of brown goo. We can't get Kelsey out tonight like we promised, unless we can get hold of a new donut and some lettuce."

"Oh dear. I'll try phoning Marie. And perhaps we can extend the hibernation for another day or two."

\---

The Turtle's hibernation box had been pulled out from under the bed a couple of days earlier and Kelsey had been basking under a spotlight on the chest of drawers all day. The Wolf had been doing pretty much what he always did: following Ray around when he was outside doing chores, sleeping, and begging for food when Ray was preparing dinner.

After dinner, Fraser announced in fluent penguin that the time had come for The Turtle to join them and for the pilgrims to witness The Wolf and The Turtle together. After some rather undignified squeaking Ernest asked for the gifts to be retrieved from the kitchen. Winking at Fraser, Ray obliged, and then went to the bedroom to fetch Kelsey.

"Hey, Dief, come and say hello to the turtle." Ray prodded the sleeping half-wolf. Dief continued sleeping. "There's a donut in it for you." Suddenly Dief was on his feet and heading over to greet Kelsey. As he sniffed at Kelsey's shell there was a round of applause from the penguins. Then Roald disappeared behind the couch and reappeared with a crisp lettuce leaf, whilst Fabian and Ernest rolled out a fresh donut.

"Dief" warned Fraser, and for once the wolf paid attention, sitting down next to the turtle and waiting for the donut to be carefully lined up in front of him as an offering. He even resisted temptation and watched the lettuce leaf being arranged in front of Kelsey, whilst Fraser made a short speech in penguin, gesticulating as though he too had flippers. When Fraser stopped speaking Dief pounced on his offering, but in his excitement he stepped on the lettuce leaf. Kelsey was not amused and took a vicious bite at Dief's ankle. The Wolf leapt into the air and whirled around ready to retaliate, in the process knocking over all three penguins with his tail. Fraser grabbed Dief, Ray put his hand over his eyes and groaned "Tell me when it's all over."

"Actually Ray, I think you should see this."

Ray spread his finger and peeked. The penguins were apparently in no hurry to get up from the rug. No hurry at all. Fabian had fallen first so that Ernest and Roald were pinning him down and, because he was unable to run away, it seemed that at last he had been able to give in to his desire for physical contact. He was rubbing heads with Roald and stroking both the other penguins with his flippers. Roald and Ernest were reciprocating with enthusiasm.

"Jeez, Ben! We can't watch this. It's like a penguin orgy or something."

"Dief, kitchen! Ray, grab the turtle, I think we should make a tactical withdrawal at this point."

\---

A week later Fraser, Ray, Dief and Kelsey stood at the top of the steps waving (well, Dief was wagging his tail and Kelsey may have nodded a little) as three brave little penguins saluted them and then set off on their epic journey back to the Antarctic. Fabian, in the middle, reached out his flippers and slid them around Ernest and Roald, just as Ray slipped his arm around Fraser's waist and whispered something obscenely suggestive in his ear.


End file.
